All about my mixed up life

On: The Favorite Child

If you grew up with siblings, there were bound to be times when you suspected your parents had a favorite child. Come on, admit it. In our family, of course my brother was the favorite, and don’t believe anything he says to the contrary. (I promise I wrote that before I realized it was a play on the name of the blog, but I decided to leave it in because it works) Then came my master plan to give my parents grandkids, the thing they wanted most in the world. A plan that completely backfired, because now neither of us is the favorite, the grandkids are. Who could have ever seen that coming?

No doubt, if you brought this up to your parents they would vehemently deny it, saying they loved both (all) of you equally, and in no way did they ever have a favorite child.  Well, now as a mother of two myself, I’m here to tell you they weren’t telling the whole truth.

When I’m hanging out with my three year old and she’s having fun and getting excited over the littlest thing, playing with chalk or blowing bubbles; when I see how kind and compassionate she is, telling a friend “it’s okay” and giving them a big hug when they fall down; when she does something new that I didn’t realize she knew how to do yet and I am blown away by how smart she is; when she’s cuddling with me or telling me that she loves me just out of the blue, I can’t imagine loving anyone more than I love her in those moments.

When I’m cuddling with my nine month old, when she’s nursing and falls asleep and her mouth falls open or turns up into that little smile babies get while they’re sleeping; when she sees me and gives me the biggest toothless smile ever and reaches her arms out to me; when I’m holding her and she gives me a big hug and buries her head into my neck; when I see her growing and starting to learn about the world around her, grabbing her toys and figuring out what they can do and amazing me with how much she can develop in such a short time and I start thinking about how she’s not going to be my little baby for long, I can’t imagine loving anyone more than I love her in those moments.

When I see them together, and the three year old hugs the nine month old and I can see how amazing she is as a big sister, how much she loves her baby, and how the nine month old looks at her with such adoration; when the three year old is tickling the baby’s cheeks or doing a funny dance move and the baby is laughing the whole time; when I’m lying on the couch holding both of them, cuddled up and breathing in the scent of these two lives I have created, my heart practically explodes, and I couldn’t imagine anything better than being with the two people I love more than anything in the world.

So if you asked me which one I love most, I would have to tell you the truth… both. I love both of them with 100% of my heart, and I couldn’t love either of them more.


3 comments on “On: The Favorite Child”

  1. Jenny says:

    Totally in love with this post. Now, imagine all of that, to a child that you didn’t even meet until she was 16 months old. All of that baby stuff…I missed. But did I? Not really. Every day, I look at at my daughter and can’t believe that I haven’t always been her momma. I find it hard to believe that I didn’t have all of those 16 months, or that anyone else could have possibly loved her like I (we) do. As far as my heart is concerned, she has always been mine and I have always been hers. She knows no differently, and I remember no differently. And, she is exactly like both of her parents. People are amazed when they find out that she was adopted.

    I still got those cuddles and all of those baby giggles (there is nothing better, btw). Even the dog adores her.

    1. Brenda says:

      Oh yeah, she is just like you, mostly in how sassy she is! 😉

      It is one of those things where once they’re in it, you can’t imagine or remember your life without them, they’ve always been part of you and always will be.

  2. Michele says:

    <3 <3 <3!!!

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